Five-Star Disability

Hi there everyone!

Fresh off the fun escapades outlined in previous posts; I got LOTS of readers and many comments! Thank you!

Today, I’m going to tickle your funny bone with this post, or at least I hope too!

While an intervenor can do many things; supporting DeafBlind person with audio and visual info is always their top responsibility.

Yet, some situations are taboo; and I am going to tell you about some of them. If you have OTHER tasks that you think are important to share, things that an intervenor cannot do, please share!

First off, an intervenor cannot clean your stove. Nor can they do housework. Which is not very funny, right? Yet, they can and will explain, read, the label of Easy-Off oven cleaner, they would also help you spray the right areas, but the actual cleaning is up to you. They can explain by tactile, or pro-tactile, where in your house there is a piece of bacon on the floor (true story), or piles of dirt, pills, thumb tacks, etc. Then you would sweep the crap up!

Next: An Intervenor will not, should not, help you pick out sexy lingerie. No, wait, this depends on a few schemata, such as if husband (DeafBlind) is buying for wife, or vice versa, or either versa (LGBT+). But, I feel if the DeafBlind person is buying for themselves, that is no-go zone. Another situation under this heading that is doable in any setting, is if the DeafBlind and Intervenor are comfortable discussing this beforehand. If there is a good rapport, and the intervenor is not prone to joking about sizing, etc… then it is perfectly fine. The key is to be open!

Another thing an intervenor should not do is… accompany a DeafBlind person into an adult sex store. This should be left to the spouse or partner! Tactilely explaining vibrators and dildos and other gadgets can probably be rather embarrassing! I won’t go further!

Bathrooms, if intervenor and DeafBlind are of opposites, the intervenor can enter room quickly to explain the layout to DeafBlind person then leave. Meeting outside. If they are the same, it really follows what is comfortable for either. But, if not, it is best to assume the DeafBlind person should go first. Which brings me to a funny story…

Years ago I worked as an intervenor with an elderly gentleman who was fully DeafBlind; we had some memorial adventures, none like this: One afternoon, he needed to use the bathroom, and so did I. We entered the bathroom, which was very busy, and I calmed asked him if wanted to Stand (pee) or Sit (pee or poop). He said clearly “Stand,” so I took him to the line of urinals, explained that the sinks were to the left, he was about 3 urinals from the sinks. I then retreated, anxious to unload my excrement, found myself a stall around the corner of the urinals. I did my business, then quickly washed my hands, taking the longer way back to the urinal area, I am DeafBlind myself so I didn’t hear the racket. He was in the middle of the room, swinging his cane madly, signing “Craig Craig Craig!!!” Everyone was avoiding him, swinging that cane! Finally I got to him, I asked “you okay?” to which he replied, as nonchalantly as a DeafBlind person could, probably a bit meekly, “I want to sit…” Oh by all means! I showed him to a stall, and stood guard at the locked door like a Secret Service Agent standing outside the stall door as the POTUS takes a dump! Giggles!

Thank you for reading!

(I need to drink more Quattro Shot Americanos at 4 PM. This blog just flew off my mind, even faster off my fingers!

Good day!